I’ve always been a chunk, you know? Even back in high school, when I was a mere 120 pounds, all my friends were anorexic 98-pounders, so I was the fat chick. Looking back on it now, of course, I can’t believe I ever looked that good.
My whole life has been on a diet. I’ve done WW, cabbage soup, grapefruit, Mediterranean, Atkins, Pritikin, you name it. And they mostly kept things under control. But as I’ve reached “a certain age,” after giving birth to two kids, and then breaking my foot a year ago, things have just gotten way out of hand.
The doctors, of course, have made it clear to me that everything in the world would be better if I would just lose weight. My blood pressure, the pain in my foot, my sleep apnea – apparently weight loss is the magic cure for all my ills.
So I am gonna give it a shot. I am gonna try to lose 10 lbs before RWA in June. And, being a writer, I’m gonna write about it here on my blog.
Usually when you start something new with a good goal in mind, you feel really excited and it takes a few days for the daily grind of it to set in. But I’m not excited. I’ve been fighting this problem every day of my life, and I am tired before I even start this new effort.
I’m starting Weight Watchers for about the 500th time today. I first did it in 1979, back when they made you eat four eggs and a serving of liver every week. Never have made goal, despite all my attempts. Once or twice I managed to lose 20 lbs or so, but never have been able to keep it up.
I’m pretty sure that this should tell me that WW is not the way to go. But I can’t figure out what the way to go is. I got on the WW online “support boards” this morning to see if anyone had any advice. The only response I got told me that I have a bad attitude. Yep, that would be me.
She also said that I have to find some exercise I enjoy. Well, y’all hold your breath for that. I’ve been trying to find that since I was 15. If reading, writing, knitting, sewing, baking, etc. were exercise, I’d be all over it. But none of the things I enjoy doing count.
So yes, I have a bad attitude. I am pissed as hell at having to do this. But I’m gonna see if I can do it, bad attitude, hatred of exercise and all. Y’all stay tuned.